Well, you know what they say about Brits abroad.

Hic. Stevie & I were invited to a do at the British Embassy by a friend of ours who works there. Scratch that, by the parents of Orla's best friend whose dad works there - we just live vicariously off of the back of her social life, and occasionally benefit from it. The event was arranged by the Embassy as they wish to engage more with the British community living in Berlin. So I asked some friends to come along, and just as well I did, because not only did Stevie get ill and thus decide to stay home, but I needed their steadying arms to lean on to get home. 

It was a casual enough affair. No ballgowns or cocktail dresses, no black tie. The dress code on our lovely white card invites stated "Business suit". Given that I haven't worked in business since I had the kids that proved more of a headache than I had thought it might. In fact, it was almost harder to sort an outfit for that than it was to dress Orla as a rainbow from her favourite book for International Book Day that morning. (It's the shoes mostly, I don't have the shoes any more for these things. Actually, I have yellow shoes or red shoes or turquoise or pink shoes that I could have worn if I had gone as a rainbow, but black business heels are slightly lacking.)

As it started at 6pm I decided not to eat beforehand. And then once I was there I didn't really fancy eating. Possibly because I'd already started drinking. The big disappointment of the night was that while there were silver service waiters complete with big silver platters, they were sadly not piled high with pyramids of Ferrero Rocher, but with tiny sandwiches, dates wrapped in bacon, mini skewers of cherry tomato, basil, and buffalo mozzarella. Oh, and free drink. Endless free drink. They gave up with the trays of glasses after a while and just followed me around with a bottle. I don't know how much I drank on an empty stomach, but I do know I very only a vague idea of what the message they were trying to get across through last night was.

I remember the prize draw, and all of us singing happy birthday to Orla's friend's dad, and I remember them wanting us to watch a film about, well it was either about the Olympics or about the 'Great' Britain campaign, but what I remember about it was that they had used M People as the soundtrack. You know, "What have you done today, to make you feel proud?..." - yup, that one. That seems to have been used for every promotional 'upbeat/patriotic/blah, blah' British event for the past 10 years. Seriously, has there been nothing else to replace that yet?

I took my camera with me because I thought the building would be architecturally wonderful to photograph. And it probably was, but at the beginning of the night I felt a bit self-conscious, and by the time I had lost that self-consciousness, the architecture had gone a little bit blurry. It was a great night though, I met a few people I knew from Rolls-Royce, and a few people I knew from the school, and a few more people like myself who were having more than a little trouble getting their sentences to come out straight.

We stayed beyond the official end of the event. In fact we stayed until the wine ran out and the waiters took the glasses from our hands. Though my good friend at the top did put up a particularly good fight for hers with a waiter with enormous muscles. He might have been strong, but he wasn't strong enough to come between a girl and her last dribble of wine.

So perhaps I am meant to be full of the joys of patriotism this morning, and blogging about how exciting it will be for M People to be back in the charts this summer, but it's all a bit of a blur. Oh, there was a bit about a gate as well, though I am not sure what that was really about. And there was a bit where I mistook someone from Rolls-Royce for one of Frau Dietz's friends from Uni, and nearly asked "How is it you seem about 6 inches taller since the last time I saw you?". But judging from the shocking deterioration of my photos over the course of 2.5 hours, I'd say it was a roaring success!

P.S. Completely coincidentally, I read this article in the Guardian this morning about national stereotypes which is quite funny. 

The art of procrastination (in a morning nutshell)

I woke up knowing that I have some forms to fill out. Once I get Orla's packed lunch made and her breakfast out, and roll into bed with Hamish for his morning cuddle while she eats, then it'll be time to get her dressed and off out the door, and get Hamish fed and dressed. Only once that's done, and usually once Hamish is off to Kita (but not today) then my day starts. And I remember that I have to get these forms filled out.

I am walking from the kitchen to the living room when I glance at the table and see what I was working on last night. It wouldn't hurt to just paint a little more in while I am still in the mood and feeling enthused. It's the sort of thing that you can paint in small amounts anyway, so maybe just a little bit. You know what? I should really take some photos of this. I should send something to Sarah because all she's had is that teeny sketch, and it might have been hard to visualise. Ah, my battery needs charging. I should sort that out now while I remember. Which reminds me that I need to charge my phone as well. Where have I left it. Must be in my bag.

I'll just charge my camera battery for a short time while I make coffee so that I can take a quick photo to upload. Oh, is that some Schoko leibniz in the cupboard. Gaarrgh...yes it is, but they've been sitting since last summer, and gone all soft.I might as well clear out this cupboard first. Ok, so, coffee. Then I'll just get this photo done and uploaded, and then I can do those forms.

Should I just do those flags? I should. probably. Because it's going to annoy me not knowing if that red is going to work or not. I should just do it. Ok, so upload and get it into the secret album on Facebook. I'll just check my notifications and emails first. Let's see if there's anything happening on my Fionagray.paints facebook page. Ugh. Nothing. No wonder I haven't posted on the blog for ages. Might as well just do a quick one with this picture while I know where it is. Just a quick one. It will take no time at all. Oh, my stats are up! I wonder why? Oh there are links from Pinterest, I wonder if it's anyone I know, I'll just take a look and see and quickly check if there's anything new that catches my eye.

20 minutes later. I should get on to those forms, but I should just check my email first. Orla needs 'national dress and food' for International Day on the 30th. I bet that Tam O'Shanter hat is in a drawer in her room. Maybe later I should take Hamish down to Idee and see if I can buy some tartan fabric to make her a kilt. Snack time. Which means peeling a cucumber and chopping it into lumps for Hamish. I'll have some of that nice cheese that Lynne recommended. I should send her a quick text and thank her for Sunday. Which reminds me, I need to wrap Ofek's birthday present and see if I have a card somewhere. Really should go to Idee after I fill out these forms, because I am pretty sure I'll need a card.

Interlude to make a track for Hamish and his trains. Back to the table to finish the ribbon on the present. Those flag poles are going to annoy me. I must at least get rid of all the white space on this picture. Then I'll be able to put it out of my head until this evening. I consider whether I should outline everything in pen once this is finished or just leave it. I would do it now except for the fact that I know I am going to rework the hill sections so that they look more blended. I might need a finer nib pen because didn't all of mine run out before Christmas when i was trying to draw on some surface that just sucked the ink out of them? i must get to Idee later. Or maybe a grey pen would work better than black. I check how fine the ones I bought in that chemists are. That would be great actually. Right. Flag poles and then forms.

My blood sugar feels a bit low. How can it be lunch time already? I'll get Hamish ready and we can nip round to Nah und Gut for something for the lunch. God, my blood sugar is really low. I might peg out before we get there. I eat a bar of chocolate and then decide just to make ham sandwiches. We can go out in a bit. I haven't even put on any make-up yet. I'll do that now. And then sort those clouds. And put on a DVD for Hamish. And maybe get those forms done. I should blog about this. It'll only take a minute and he's watching  Thomas the Tank Engine anyway. I could do those forms when he has a nap. If he has a nap. Or I could do a bit of painting. While there's a bit of light.

Before every party, I Google my guests

The spy who went out in the snow.

Ssssshhhhhh..... the neighbours might be listening!

There are moments when I think that it would have been wise to have thought about this whole blog thing prior to starting it off. At times I have my regrets that I have used my own name and used photos of myself and the kids and all that malarky, and obviously if I had done that I could talk about anything I like without worrying about people I know either Googling me and finding out things about me that I wouldn't really want them to know, and I could have a good old moan about all the people who thoroughly annoy me, and I could talk about other things that I'd like to talk about but which I am rather reticent to because I want to keep some things a little more private.

But I didn't. And it's not that big a deal really. Sometimes though there are little moments when people say things to me and I jolt thinking, "How did you know that?". Sometimes I am surprised by the people I know from real life who read my blog. It's never who I think it would be.

Last night I spent some time trying to find out how strangers see my 'timeline' on Facebook. That was a whole lot of not much fun. For yesterday afternoon we went to a New Year/New Baby/New Neighbours party (yes, really, it was 3 times the fun) downstairs in our building. And about 30 minutes after we arrived the hostess and I had the opportunity to chat for a bit and her opening line was "I know your daughter is at the British School, but your looking at ###### School, aren't you?".

I couldn't help but be shocked and ask "How did you know that?". There was a slight pause and then she gave me an answer which didn't really answer my question, and eventually took it off topic. I could have pressed her, but my brain had already bolted back upstairs and was logging into Blogger, searching posts for references to this. It was just my body that was locked into being polite, and stayed drinking coffee for a while longer, and comparing apartment sizes with the rest of the neighbours.

For there is no way that this woman should know this. I haven't mentioned my plans to any of my neighbours, and I don't believe that we share any friends that would have mentioned this fact. So, the first thing I did once we got home after stopping Orla from crying, getting Hamish a drink, making the dinner, getting the kids ready for bed and settling Hamish down, was check out my blog and when I found no reference there, I checked Facebook. And then I considered that the apartment might be bugged. (Which led to some really bad dreams)

So, I might be a little more cagey about what's happening with us and our staying/going/relocating plans for a while. At least until things are little more settled.... and I have checked the lightswitches for tiny microphones.

New Years *Intentions*

Apparently only 12% of all resolutions made are achieved. That's not that hard to believe really. The top 5 resolutions year on year seem to be 1. Lose weight; 2. Save money; 3. Fall in love/get married; 4. Read more books; 5. Keep an notepad of awesome moments. Most people, well, Americans - they were the ones who were surveyed, but I'm going with it, give up after the first 2 months.  I've read this year that some people are making lists of  'New Years Intentions': a thoroughly modern idea for the commitment-phobic amongst us. And perfect for those who can't deal with failure.

My own list of failures featured on my last blog post is likely to roll over into 2012. Apparently this is NOT good working practice. You are meant to scrap anything that you didn't achieve, and start afresh. Though re-phrasing seems to be allowed. So, if for example you failed to shift that 30lbs last year, this year you could say that you "intend to eat healthier/take more exercise" - see that "intend" in there? I am so very modern in my commitment-phobic-realistic-goal setting.

I haven't really got any strong feelings for resolutions-slash-intentions for 2012. Instead Stevie has been making some for me. Aside from that I have had a few thoughts that may end up being resolutions.

1. Lose 5kg. This is Stevie's 'Happy New Year. Here's a resolution for you' idea. I would like to lose some weight and he has said that if I do it he will buy me an iPad. (We do love incentive schemes in our house!) As yet we haven't negotiated on the memory it'll come with, I feel there's plenty of time for that, dear reader, oh yes. It seems that 'thinking thin', my previous strategy lacks any kind of proof that it works. So I may actually have to do something *shudder* to make this happen. I hate to say it, but I have my fingers crossed for a really bad stomach bug....

2. Blog less, do more. It would be nice, wouldn't it? I noticed when I was in Scotland over Christmas that I didn't miss it, and didn't feel like I had anything that I was bursting to blog about. In fact, I quite revelled in the additional time I had when I wasn't stuck to a computer. Though now that I've typed that I realise that if I gained an iPad (see resolution no.1) then my online time is likely to surge, not decrease. Ah well, I can't succeed at everything. But in fact, the thing which led me to this idea was that Stevie keeps talking about how we will potentially be moving back to Derby in May. Yes, I know, it's making me panic too. But while I was lying awake in bed worrying about that prospect, I also thought that if that happens I will stop blogging. When I announced this to Stevie he seemed to think I was just full of the 1st of January blues. But the truth is if we were to go back, I am not sure beyond the initial horror of repatriation shock and settling back in, that I would have anything to blog about. You know? Obviously though I would pick it back up again when we realised we hated being back (despite the wondrous supermarkets, M&S, year-round sales, English speaking people, tv on tap, etc, etc) and move to Canada.

3. De-clutter. Last year I wanted to get rid of all the remaining baby stuff. I think my plan was to start using German eBay and the first thing I wanted to sell was the highchair. This year I am totally vowing to sell the highchair. As handy as it is for holding coats in Hamish's little bedroom, it's got to go. It may also be a fond farewell to my Phil & Ted's, two cotbeds, and a whole lot of toys that are too young for both of them. The toys drive me to distraction. every time I embark on a clear-out, O & H decide to start playing with the stuff again. It will have to be done in the dead of night. Oh and here's another one: I vow not to feel even the tiniest pang of guilt this year when I hoover up every last Playmobil flower that I come across. Seriously, do they make those just to drive mothers mental?

And that's about it. Doesn't sound too unattainable, does it? What are your goals for 2012?

Waking the dead.

Because even the long dead get wound up by other people's mobile phones ringing.

Schloss Charlottenburg. Lovely, but I won't be back I suppose. 

I tend not to publicise my blog through Facebook. Mostly because I really don't want the people I don't really like reading it. And of course I am friends with them on Facebook, because sometimes you just don't have a choice in these things. I am referring of course to 'smeeviee's family'. I'm mumbling just in case they can hear me. That's one thing I hate about Facebook; I have yet to find an acceptable way to say 'I don't want to be your friend' to them. Saying, 'Um, we're not really friends in real life' doesn't really go down well, nor does 'I don't want you noseying through my business, even though I have no issue with strangers and people I haven't actually seen in 30 years doing so'. - perhaps because they're not going to take offence and go on and on about it for years afterwards.

Anyway, at the end of last week and this weekend we've had Stevie's parents staying with us. At this point I should mention that in actual fact I am far more tolerant of his parents than he himself is. I sometimes get the impression that he could quite happily wave them back on the plane an hour and half after their arrival. Much as I'd love to outline where my tolerance breaks down, I will resist, because you just never know who's reading. And it's not that I have written down all the hundreds of little funny anecdotes I have, more because they are super defensive and wouldn't appreciate the little tales I tell about their son.

Long may they never Google my name. That's all I can say.

But, I'm losing my thread. What I was going on to say was that upon arrival this time I was met by a complaint: that I hadn't updated my FB status to say how excited I was at their impending arrival, when I had done on numerous occasions before when my friends had visited. I think it was meant as a joke with a little bit of seriousness wedged in at the back, but they didn't seem too happy when I joked right on back that I forgot, but I'd be sure to put on FB just how excited I'd be when they left. Maybe it was that big chunk of underlying truth that rendered it unfunny to them, I don't know, but hey, I was laughing.

But in actual fact, we've had a pleasant few days. It can be quite difficult to entertain visitors who don't really want to see the place, and would be happy enough to just sit in the apartment for the duration. But I took them to Schloss Charlottenburg on Friday and managed to provide them with some impromptu entertainment by getting myself thrown out (and very likely banned) from a mausoleum. It wasn't fun. After listening to a lengthy list of 'Do's and Don't's' from the attendant outside it was a bit embarrassing to see the same attendant racing into the mausoleum at warp-speed to drag me out no more than a minute later. But on the positive side at least I found out that my phones 'silent' mode doesn't work. Silver lining's and all that I suppose. And it put a smile on my visitors faces for the rest of the afternoon seeing me hauled out and publicly shamed. And that set us up for the rest of the weekend which was pleasant and a lot less eventful.

German fashion for October

I was planning on writing a post about my love of the dirndl. And I have done, but it's on my arty blog, 'fiona gray . paints'. So, if you fancy a quick rummage around what the web has to offer dirndl-wise (everything from everyday to wedding day, and C&A to couture) then come on over!

(And then I want you to visualise yourself in the one where she's holding a coffee at the school PTA coffee morning...)

work like you don't need the money

Would you like to have a look at my etchings? http://fionagraypaints.com

I've been ultra-busy this morning. No, not hanging out that washing that's been in the machine for days, and no, not picking up the 60,000 little teeny toys (when did we suddenly move into the realm of toys that can only be found by a magnifying glass or a bare foot in the dark?) Nope. I have finally stopped pretending I am still on maternity leave and have started getting my act together in regards to my future career and have been making steps towards promoting myself and the things that I do.

You may have seen some of my paintings on this blog, but why not go on over to my sparkly new blog fiona gray . paints if you want to have a little look at some more. I've been putting fiona gray . paints together over the past few weeks, and today I made my very own Facebook page. I'm in a bad mood though, because I went and lost the ability to promote the page to my Facebook friends, so I would love you all to just shift your cursor over to the left there and click on my 'like' button. It would be nice to have your support, and anyway, if you like me on here, you'll LOVE me on Facebook. But you don't need to declare your love just yet. How about we start off with liking and then we could maybe be friends and who knows maybe in a couple of years we could settle down, buy an apartment somewhere and get a dog.

I've done a few little commissions since having the kids, which was a real learning experience for me. I never realised just how much of my time is taken up by the kids. So they have given me a good insight into my eh, limitations, in regards time. (Why is it whenever I want to paint in the evening they won't go to bed?)

The next steps for me are getting an etsy shop set up and getting some prints done and maybe some cards, and hopefully doing a few more paintings to sell. Wish me luck!

Lightbulb moment: I find myself

I reckon if I just put a rug over it, that's pretty much me done*

I have never (to my knowledge) known anyone who's needed to "find themself". I have never had the urge to find myself. I am right here on the sofa woofing down a can of salted cashews like there is no tomorrow. In fact, I can barely type because I am so hungry and can't stop eating them. Why? Well, I decided I should start a diet, literally eat less cause I eat too much, and now I am really, really hungry. I can't stand being hungry, and that is probably the fundamental basis of dieting, and that combined with the fact that I am woofing back these cashew nuts, is probably not going to make my bum smaller.

Nonetheless, here I am, now utterly parched from all that salt, and I am completely off-topic. The point is, I have inadvertantly discovered an awful truth about myself. And not through going off to Thailand and laying on a beach, though that mught be nice, and I might lose weight as I don't really like Thai food. No, sadly I was reading my own blog. I was reading it because someone I met in the past few months has asked if they can read it and I thought I better just make sure I hadn't inadvertantly mentioned them somewhere or said something that they'd get upset with. Quite why though I started reading from the beginning I have no idea, but I did and it was a bit like reading about someone else.

And that person is LAZY. Totally and utterly. I think I have always painted it as 'procrastination', but no, now that it's all laid out in front of me in black and white and sometimes photographic blog form, I can see it for what it is. I have always known that I am not tidy; that I hate cleaning, but looking back, I am just kidding myself. I patently just. can't. be. bothered.

I'd like to think I had changed. I'd love to say that this move to Berlin has made me into a nicer, tidier, cleaner person, but it hasn't. Today, I got a call while I was at the doctor's with Hamish from the guy who's been looking at our mouldy window in the back bedroom to say he wanted to come round again to have another look. Hamish and I raced back, and I had a half hour to get the place into a reasonable shape for a 'guest'. I went into the bedroom and saw a mountain of assorted crap on the floor. I could have sorted out the dirty washing from the boxes of contact lenses and shin guards and shoes, but I didn't. I did my usual and opened the wardrobe and stuffed the whole lot in, and told Hamish not to go near the wardrobe doors lest he be lost in a freak wardrobe avalanche.

I then went round the other rooms and did pretty much the same thing, throwing toys into boxes they didn't come from, and cleaning only the bits of the bathroom floor that you can see. Unfortunately I missed the little brioche roll we'd been keeping behind the sofa that sits 2 feet in front of the living room window where the man stood and took some more photos. It would have been better for me if it had stayed stuck to the sole of his shoe and he'd taken it away with him.

Tomorrow I have a plumber coming round at 8am. We have a leak under the sink. I have had to force myself to clean and tidy the kitchen tonight. Not even my shame is enough. I had to bribe myself with the cashew nuts to get myself to scrub the kitchen floor. If I thought I could put it off until tomorrow I would have. But I am too lazy to get up at 6 am to get started on it.

The only thing going in my favour is the fact that I did actually sort out the pile of crap stuffed into the wardrobe tonight. But that was only after Stevie inadvertantly decided to get himself ready for football training...

* Actually, I would just like to point out that this photo was taken just after we moved in. It's not like that anymore. Honestly... Half of it is hidden by our dining room table and chairs.

I'm busy doing nothing.

I think I saw this on FB somewhere and liked it (no, not 'liked' it, just liked it in a normal way)but I forgot to save the source details, so apologies for not linking back to the life coach who created this.

I am an expert when it comes to frittering away time. I just need to sit down with access to the internet and all of a sudden two hours mysteriously pass. Which surprises me really, because I don't look at that many websites, not really, well, maybe just a few, enough I suppose that if you asked me where you could get a really pretty digital radio from online, or which website would give you the best price for a chrome Magimix food processor, I would have no hesitation in telling you. Incidentally, I have neither of these things, which is probably why I have these things stashed in my head taking up space where some German verbs should be conjugating.

Stevie has gone back to Derby for work, and I, secretly, having a little holiday. Just from German class. I think it has done me the world of good. I've had two lovely mornings of frittering away time. Yesterday I used the time well I think and took the long trek along to the doctors to get my repeat prescription. I altered the amounts so that I don't need to go back for insulin as often and the receptionist didn't bat an eyelid. I'd expected to have to have a discussion about this, so perhaps there are benefits to the German medical system after all.

Anyway, I also stopped along the way on the way back and did some food shopping, went to the post office and took some photos of some of the 60's and 70's style U-Bahn stations along the way.

Then I came home and did a little light blog reading and pottering around the house. Lovely! Today was much the same but with some tidying up thrown in. I've really enjoyed having a break from class. Stevie's back tonight so I'll be back at school tomorrow. Bah humbug!

But it's been nice while it's lasted.

1. organise, 2. prioritise, 3. & get off that bloody internet!

Of course I do the nice things first, and leave the actual important things till last

I feel so way behind on everything at the moment. It's driving me crazy. All I want is to have a few extra hours every day to just get things done. I read lots of blogs (particularly the creative ones) where people seem to be able to do a million things a day, every day and I'm not sure why this kind of beautiful life evades me. How do people have time to blog, knit a dress, go thrifting, take some time out to photograph a friends new baby, spend some time in their studio painting gorgeous pictures, and take photographs of their enviable homes, etc, etc, and yet I am struggling to find the time each day to phone the tax office and stay in a queue for 20 minutes?

Perhaps it's because I spend too much time reading these blogs? I do hope that's not the answer.

So I have a long list of things that all need doing now, some of them nice things like design work and making a photobook for both my mother-in-law and mum (see above), and some of them ok things like completing Orla's school application, and some tedious but necessary things, like reapplying for Orla's Kita voucher as she gets it free now, and possibly going to the Burgeramt to wait for 2 hours to get a form stamped for the tax office.

Of course on top of these things I have my general day to day stuff to do, tidying up, cleaning, cooking, helping people pee in toilets and potties, stopping people breaking legs from jumping off the table and from scaring the living daylights out of their sister by locking her in our wardrobe. Oh and German. My German needs quite a bit of attention and when I do have the time to study, I generally have no desire to do that.

Anyway, I just can't fathom how to fit more into my days. There must be blogs I could be reading about this... (and that is a little bit of irony right there).

What your toddler may be doing now:

Following on from my last post, Mwa suggested I find a book to resolve my Hamish-hating-Kita problem. I cannot remember the last time I looked in a baby/child development book. The pages of my 'toddler' ones have barely been opened. I used to really love these books, especially after having Orla and you could see what she might be up to in the forthcoming months and think what a smart baby she was when she was doing things advanced for her age and curse her for not being able to do half the things she should be able to do for her age.

Before the move I got rid of all my baby ones and on checking just now I have found 3 'toddler' ones: What to Expect: the toddler years; The Best Friends Guide to toddlers; and god knows how, but 'The Contented Toddler Years' by Gina Ford. (I must have been having a really bad day with Orla when I bought that. In fact when I flick it to see where it wants most to open (cause it looks pretty much untouched) I see what was going on...'sleep problems'. Desperate times and all that.

So, back to my Hamish problem. According to 'What to Expect' my 30 month old toddler should be able to put on an article of clothing, identify 1 picture by naming, jump up, name 6 body parts, and identify 4 pictures by pointing. I think we have pretty much got those covered except perhaps the jumping part. Hamish is dreadful at jumping. Problem-wise, the best I can see that they have is 'Separation Anxiety at Preschool'. They suggest that the transition between home and school can be tough for a toddler and it can take some children up to a year to get used to it. Eek.They suggest that if your childs separation anxiety is 'unexplained' to read another passage at the back of the book. There's talk there of "unexplained bruises and other signs of abuse". This does not make for good pre-bedtime reading for someone like myself.

On to 'the Best Friends Guide'- I've always liked these books. They're humourous and make you feel ok about being generally crap at parenting. On this occasion it has precisely.. eh, no advice to give on my Hamish situation. Ah well, can't have everything.

Lastly, let's see what Gina has to say: "a firm goodbye, a kiss and a hug, follwed by a prompt departure is easiest for a child to deal with". She also says "Some children develop a fear of certain people and places... . Role playing can be an effective and fun way of helping them conquer these fears.... . Read him books that involve happy stories of a child visiting [Kita]". At least her approach is consistent. I will try a firm goodbye tomorrow and advise Hamish to keep a stiff upper lip even if his bottom one is wobbling. Wish me luck!

new year, new blog!

I started a 365 photo blog today. I've seen a few of these around and quite like the idea of looking back over a year in pictures. I see a lot of different and interesting things here in Berlin but don't always have an awful lot to say about them. So I'll share them here. I've also sort of decided not to mention it to Stevie as he possibly thinks one of my new year resolutions should be 'spend less time on the internet'. Take a look every so often if you want to. Here we go...

http://somewhere365.blogspot.com/

(Oh and I'm also combining it with my 'somewhere...somehow' list of things to do in the forthcoming year, staring with the 'sorting out of my horrible hair')

Fed up with Facebook

It was fun for a while, Facebook, wasn't it?

I really enjoyed looking at photos of people I haven't seen since school, university, previous workplaces, and their babies, and their weddings, and holidays. Of course I have always been one to reciprocate. I have plenty of albums of photos of my kids and places I've been and all that kind of stuff.

And I really have enjoyed being back in touch with people who I never would have otherwise, and now I have lots of little friendships re-ignited and all of that is brilliant and makes me happy. And of course it's really handy with us being away for two years. People can keep up with what we're up to and how the kids are changing and growing and it's an easy way to stay in contact.

But recently I started to get sick of the whole thing. I used to post links to my blog through Facebook but then I realised that there were probably quite a few people on there that I really didn't want knowing exactly what I was doing. Not for any terrible reason, just little things like one person who had previously been a good friend who when they moved house just wouldn't even give me their new address to send a card to. Needless to say, why would I want to share what is going on in my life with them. So they were the first person I deleted. (Though actually, going by my little visitor monitor, I think they are still reading the blog, and it's about high time they stuck to their guns and got lost).

Then other friends started doing 'friend culls' of people who they either had made friends with and then had nothing to do with, or people who "bring nothing to the party". You know, the ones who don't do anything on Facebook but lurk around looking at everyone elses stuff and usually haven't even bothered to put up a profile photo. When I stopped posting links to my blog one of these people got in touch with me and asked what was going on in my life as I had been a bit quiet recently. Literally a one line email. I'm surprised they didn't just ask for the web address.

Then I discovered that I could be a bit more experimental with the privacy settings, and I started to block some people's access to certain photo albums, links, and so on. Again, someone who has never put up a single photo emailed me asking if I had had a good holiday and where were the photos from it. Not that my photos are really anything of interest to most people.

And recently it's been friend requests. It's such a sensitive subject for people. If you don't accept their friend request then people take offence. That's fine if it's someone from school or whatever that you never see anyway, but it's a bit more difficult when it's Stevie's friends who we see sometimes when we go back to Scotland. Or your mother-in-law or your mother-in-law's best friend. It's not that I don't like these people, but I certainly don't want them seeing all the little funny things I might say about life with Stevie...now do I?

So it's just becoming a lot less fun and too much like a hassle. Or maybe I'm just tired and need to stop taking it so seriously and go to bed.